Dealing With Burnout (Part 1 of 2)

by George Stahnke

“Burnout.” What do you think of when you hear that all-too-familiar term? I can tell you what comes into my mind: the guy who found out the hard way that burning the candle at both ends does not make you brighter!

Why do I say this? Because I was that guy! I learned my lesson through tough personal experience. And I’m absolutely certain that I’m not alone. Many of us in professional ministry are living our lives as though we were an inexhaustible resource. That’s not a good idea.

Several years ago there came a day when I found myself saying to my church board, “I think I may be in trouble. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m experiencing increased anxiety. I find myself easily irritated with my wife and children for no apparent reason. I’m going to see a counselor. Please pray for me.”

I went home from that meeting and shared with my wife what I had said to the board. I told her that I was going to call Dr. Mike. And that’s exactly what I did. I remember it like it was yesterday. At our third counseling session, he was ready to give me his diagnosis. I braced myself, almost afraid to hear what he had to say. Then came the verdict: “George, your life is  out of balance. You are suffering from burnout.” What a relief! I wasn’t going crazy after all! 

Exactly what is “burnout”? In psychological terms, it refers to long-term exhaustion resulting in diminished interest in work. It’s a state of mind in which continual, unrelieved stress can produce feelings of depression, hopelessness, and helplessness. Typically, these feelings are accompanied by a loss of coping skills at home and the office. This leads to negative attitudes towards work, ministry, family and self. Ministry leaders will often report that they experience decreased mental energy and initiative. There is also a loss of confidence, increased anxiety, angry flare-ups, and emotional detachment. The list goes on as one becomes increasingly less effective.

Is there a way to avoid “burnout”? My answer is “yes”! And I’d suggest that the first step is realizing that you’re vulnerable. This phenomenon is especially prevalent among ministers. According to an article in the New York Times (August 1, 2010), 40% of pastors and 47% of pastoral spouses are suffering from burnout, frantic schedules, and/or unrealistic expectations. And 45% of pastors say that they’ve experienced depression or burnout to the extent that they needed to take a leave of absence from ministry. If you don’t fall into that category now, there’s a pretty good chance that you will at some point in in the future – unless you make up your mind to do something about it.

What exactly can you do? I’ll share some specific strategies that will help you steer clear of “burnout” in Part 2 of this article. In the meantime, I want to encourage you sit back and take a deep breath. If you’re experiencing any of the symptoms that drove me to have that memorable talk with my board, you can take courage in the thought that you’re not alone. There is something you can do to address the situation. And help is on the way.

Don't Be a "Chocolate Only" Christian!

Through Jesus you can also experience genuine peace within yourself. Internal peace is a sense of wholeness, contentment, tranquility, order, rest, and security. Although nearly everyone longs for this kind of peace, it eludes most people. Genuine internal peace cannot be directly obtained through our own efforts; it is a gift that God gives only to those who believe in his Son and obey his commands (1 John 3:21-24). In other words, internal peace is a by-product of righteousness. This truth is revealed throughout Scripture:

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you" (Isa. 26:3).

"The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever" (Isa. 32:17; cf. Pss. 85:10; 119:165).

"If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea" (Isa. 48:18).

These passages show why it is impossible to experience internal peace if you fail to pursue peace with God and peace with others. Internal peace comes only from being reconciled to God through his Son, receiving his righteousness and the power to resist sin, and then obeying what God commands. "And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us" (1 John 3:23). By God's design, the three dimensions of peace are inseparably joined. As one author expressed it, "Peace with God, peace with each other and peace with ourselves come in the same package."

Taken from The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict
by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 46-47.

Fruits of Repentance

"Produce fruit in keeping with repentance." Matthew 3:8

Although repentance is often accompanied by sorrow, simply feeling bad does not prove that one is repentant. In fact, there is a world of difference between mere remorse and genuine repentance... Worldly sorrow means feeling sad because you got caught doing something wrong or because you must suffer the unpleasant consequences of your actions... In contrast, godly sorrow means feeling bad because you have offended God. It means sincerely regretting the fact that what you did was morally wrong, regardless of whether or not you must suffer unpleasant consequences. It involves a change of heart... Godly sorrow will not always be accompanied by intense feelings, but it implies a change in thinking, which should lead to changes in behavior.

Taken from The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 118-119.

The Balanced Spirit--Filled Church: Overview of 1 Corinthians 12-14

2.) Without love its just noise

1 Corinthians 13:1 (NASB) 1If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.

1 Corinthians 13:1 (NLT) 1If I could speak in any language in heaven or on earth but didn’t love others, I would only be making meaningless noise like a loud gong or a clanging cymbal.

3.) Without love it’’s meaningless

1 Corinthians 13:2 (ASB) 2If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 

4.) Without love there is no benefit

1 Corinthians 13:3 (ASB) 3And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.

1 Corinthians 13:13—14:1a (NIV) 13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.14:1 Follow the way of love and eagerly desire spiritual gifts . . .

The Balanced Spirit-Filled Church: Overview of 1 Corinthians 12-14

Power: The gifts of the Holy Spirit

1 Corinthians 12:1 (ASB) Now concerning spiritual gifts, brethren, I do not want you to be unaware.

1 Corinthians 12:4—7 (ASB) Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. 5And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. 6There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons. 7But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.

1 Corinthians 12:31 (AMP) But earnestly desire {and} zealously cultivate the greatest {and} best gifts {and} graces (the higher gifts and the choicest graces). And yet I will show you a still more excellent way [one that is better by far and the highest of them all--love].

Love: Personal sacrifice to benefit others.

1 Corinthians 13:1—3 (ASB) If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.

Order: All things must be done properly.

1 Corinthians 14:1—5 (NIV) Follow the way of love and eagerly desire spiritual gifts, especially the gift of prophecy. 2 For anyone who speaks in a tongue does not speak to men but to God. Indeed, no one understands him; he utters mysteries with his spirit. 3 But everyone who prophesies speaks to men for their strengthening, encouragement and comfort. 4 He who speaks in a tongue edifies himself, but he who prophesies edifies the church. 5 I would like every one of you to speak in tongues, but I would rather have you prophesy. He who prophesies is greater than one who speaks in tongues, unless he interprets, so that the church may be edified.

1 Corinthians 14:40 (ASB) But all things must be done properly and in an orderly manner.

1.) Love is the superior gift.

The Corinthians had not followed the excellent way of love but were worldly minded, seeking

to exalt self, and were ambitious in their manner of using the gifts of the Holy Spirit. The

condition of the Church, divisions, self-exaltations and self-confidence were the results of not

being governed by the more excellent way of love.

—Explorer’s Bible Study: New Testament Epistles & Revelation

It is tragic that in many churches, as in the one in ancient Corinth, the love that is basic to

Christian character does not characterize the membership or the ministry. Love was missing

in Corinth. Spiritual gifts were present (1:7); right doctrine for the most part was present

(11:2); but love was absent. Throughout history it seems that the church has found it difficult

to be loving. It is easier to be orthodox than to be loving, and easier to be active in church

work than to be loving. Yet the supreme characteristic that God demands of His people is

love. In opposing that love the enemy of the church makes some of his supreme efforts.

—MacArthur's New Testament Commentary: 1 Corinthians

Love: G26  γάπη agapē ag-ah'-pay from G25  γαπάω agapaō ag-ap-ah'-o

The word agape connotes a deep, abiding, self-sacrificing love—the kind that looks out for

the other person first. —Life Application Bible Commentary: 1 & 2 Corinthians

John 3:16 (ASB) “For God so loved (agapaō)the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. (emphasis Added)

John 13:34—35 (ASB) 34“A new commandment I give to you, that you love (agapaō) one another, even as I have loved (agapaō) you, that you also love (agapaō) one another. 35“By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” (emphasis Added)

John 15:9—11 (ASB)  “Just as the Father has loved (agapaō) Me, I have also loved (agapaō)you; abide in My love (agapē). 10 “If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love (agapē); just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love (agapē). 11 “These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full. (emphasis Added)

1 John 4:16 (ASB) We have come to know and have believed the love (agapaō)which God has for us. God is love (agapaō), and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. (emphasis Added)

Why your congregation needs to see your humanity

Embracing the admittance of your imperfections and sharing yourself in your sermons

by George Stahnke, August 11, 2014

When I first went into the ministry over 30 years ago, I was told “familiarity breeds contempt.” The message to me was clear; do not bare your soul to anyone in the congregation or for that matter in leadership.  You can reference the imperfections and challenges of biblical characters, but NEVER, reference yourself in the message. The lines of demarcation had to be maintained and protected.

The tragedy of this widely embraced approach was that it filtered down into everyday life of the ministry family. The challenges and dysfunctions in the home were never to be revealed. This was driven in part by fear of being misunderstood, loss of respect, reputation, and even the loss of position. To be secure in ministry meant maintaining secrecy.  This attitude fosters a false impression that the minister has no problems at all, that he or she is above the carnal tendencies of others.

This of course is one of two extremes.  The other extreme would be those who tell all, seemingly with no restraint or discernment.  In some instances their testimonies were exaggerated or false in recounting the darkness of their lives before Christ. The emphasis seemed to be more on shock value and crowd size rather than redeeming grace. In the congregational setting the goal is that all things be done to strengthen, build up, and edify those in attendance (1 Corinthians 14:26b). It is not wise nor does it honor Christ to be so bold as to “glorify the devil” in regard to past or present behavior.

Admittedly those of us in ministry must use discretion when putting ourselves into a private conversation or into a public message. I believe the balance is somewhere in the middle. The apostle Paul is a great example of the balance that we are seeking.  He was honest about his life before Christ and his present weakness but not cavalier (2 Corinthians 11:29-30).  In my own teaching and preaching I have also endeavored to be transparent. Exposing my weaknesses and failures to make reference to the glory of His manifest strength has always proved to be helpful in building others up according to their needs, and beneficial to the listener (Ephesians 3:29). 

We are ordinary people called into extraordinary service to the Lord. We struggle to live balanced lives that honor Christ. It is that struggle coupled with our submission to His divine power that enables us to conquer our fears, rise above our failures and have a message that others can relate to. Appropriate transparency in the pulpit regarding our story lends itself to authenticity and credibility. In affect we are echoing the words of the apostle Paul;  “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.”  (Philippians 3:12)

Taking Time to be Wrong

Agreeing with others, especially when they are pointing out your faults, is not easy, but it can play a crucial role in peacemaking. When you are talking with another person, first listen for the truth, resisting the temptation to defend yourself, blame others, or focus on points of disagreement. Ask yourself, "Is there any truth in what he or she is saying?" If your answer is "yes," acknowledge what is true and identify your common ground before moving to your differences. Doing so is a sign of wisdom and spiritual maturity. "Let a righteous man strike me--it is a kindness; let him rebuke me--it is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it" (Ps. 141:5). "He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise" (Prov. 15:31; cf. 15:5; 17:10; 25:12). By agreeing with the other person whenever possible, you can resolve certain issues easily and then focus profitably on matters that deserve further discussion.

Taken from The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 168-169.

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